♪ >> dicky: from hollywood, it's "jimmy kimmel live"! tonight, david spade, from "fresh off the boat" randall park, and music from the band perry. with cleto and cletones. and now, take my word for it, here's jimmy kimmel! [ cheers and applause ] ♪ [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: that's very nice. i'm jimmy, host of the show. thanks for watching.

thanks all of you for coming. i have to say i really feel the love in the air tonight. valentine's day is imminent. tomorrow's the 12th. have any of you made valentine's day plans yet? i pray that you have. it's saturday and it's supposedly going to be more expensive this year. according to those surveys they do, this year men will spend an average of $116 on valentine's day and women will spend around $77. in other words, guys, unless you have the good sense to be gay you're getting ripped off. [ laughter ] americans who expect to spend a record $18.9 billion on valentine's gifts this weekend. if they don't, there's going to be hell to pay. [ laughter ] i thought this was interesting. a lot of women give themselves flowers for valentine's day. and a lot of men give themselves sex. [ laughter ] [ cheers and applause ]

if you really want to do valentine's right, you should try to win the powerball because the powerball jackpot is up to $500 million as of tonight. to put that in perspective, with $500 million you can get hbo, showtime, and sin max. the whole package. [ laughter ] if you win, take a lump sum which makes sense, you go home with $337.8 million. which is the most money you can make for doing nothing short of becoming a kardashian. [ laughter ] one of the women who works here, one of our security guards here at the show, adelina is her name, keeps a notebook of lottery strategies. she's got a grid. that's adalina, that's her notebook. all her secrets are there. she writes numbers. she's found this is a great way to waste not only a dollar, but also an entire day of work. [ laughter ] she also happens to be wesley snipes's accountant. [ laughter ] the odds of winning the lottery are so low it's hard to even get it -- wrap your head around it.

it's basically like playing bingo against the entire population of india. but fortunately, our nation's news reporters are working very hard to remind us of just how hopeless it is. >> the odds of matching all five numbers and the powerball is 1 in 175 million. >> you have a better chance of being in a plane crash, being hit by a car while crossing the street, or even being drafted by the nba. >> you have a better chance of being crushed by an asteroid or having identical quadruplets. >> you also have a better chance of having an 11th toe. >> you have a better chance of being struck by an airplane falling out of the sky twice. >> you have a much better chance of actually being attacked by a shark multiple times the next time you go swimming. >> you're also more likely to be elected president. >> you have a 1 in 33 million chance of dying or killing someone while driving two miles to the store to buy your ticket. >> jimmy: in other words, we're all in a lot of trouble. you have better odds of being reincarnated as the love child of oprah and donald trump than winning the lottery. all you need is a dollar and a dream.

especially if your dream is to lose a dollar. very big news this week. nbc yesterday suspended news anchor brian williams for six months without pay for misrepresenting a story of something that happened to him 12 years ago in iraq. it's weird nbc gives out a harsher suspensions than the nfl, isn't it? [ laughter ] i tell you what. i've been thinking about it -- [ applause ] i'm not sure how i feel. i think i have a solution. you know what his punishment should be? they should send him up in a helicopter, fire an rpg at it, if he makes it down that's enough. he's forgiven. right? [ cheers and applause ] you know, brian has already been on a self-imposed leave of absence from nbc, reportedly planning to spend his six months away at home with his wife, wendy williams. [ laughter ] you know, i hate to say it. but brian williams isn't the only one in this family who hasn't been entirely truthful.

turns out his daughter allison isn't really a boy and cannot fly. [ laughter ] you didn't watch that? all right. well. now nbc has a hole to fill so they posted an ad on craigslist. they're looking for, this is the ad, a reasonably handsome white guy who can read. $14 million a year plus benefits. by the way, how great would it be if while brian williams was off on suspension he won the powerball? it would be -- it's very cold on the east coast right now. this comes to us from brooklyn, new york. this is a cautionary tale about irony and karma and about the dangers of making your dog wear little footies. >> come here. come here. joey, come here. [ barking ] [ laughing ] oh, you silly. [ laughter ]

[ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: that's what you get. get over here and pick up my poop! [ laughter ] while the east coast has been freezing we are experiencing record high temperatures here in southern california. it was 84 degrees here today. [ cheers and applause ] naturally tourists who are visiting are flocking to the beach. so we sent a camera out to santa monica to give some tourists who are from back east and are relaxing on the beach a chance to rub it in to their freezing friends back home on television. but we also sent my cousin sal to the beach with a bucket full of snowballs. ♪ >> sal: where are you from? >> long island, new york. >> sal: anyone you want to say hi to back there? >> hi, sammy. how you doing? oh! what the -- >> sorry, sorry.

>> anyone you want to say hi to back home? >> probably my parents -- >> snowballs! here's another one. >> all my family, i know that there's a lot of snow in quebec here the sun, the beach is perfect. >> we are training at the beach and you are in the snow right now. >> snowballs! >> whoo! >> there you two go. montreal! montreal! >> anyone you want to say hi to back there? >> mom and dad. grandma and grandpa. the usual. >> snowballs! >> [ bleep ]. [ bleep ] get away from me, you freak! you guys are freaks! come here! >> snowballs! >> [ bleep ]. >> where are you guys from? >> chicago. >> anyone you want to say hi to

back there? >> my sister marisa. >> do you want to talk to her about this weather? >> i'm having a wonderful time. and you're in the snow. really, really cold. and -- >> snow bucket! >> jimmy: that's how sal makes friends. [ cheers and applause ] this is icy fun too. there's a documentary series on epix called "the road to the nhl stadium series" following the l.a. kings and san jose sharks as they march toward a big outdoor hockey game they're playing later this month. on last night's episode we learned what happens when hockey players bring their children to practice. >> teams in the nhl spend a large portion of their season away from their families. which is why todd mclellan allows his players to bring their children to practice once a week. >> you know, sundays are usually days with daddies. that's my cup. usually all the kids are here --

all right, guys. [ cheers and applause ] he >> jimmy: he handled that better than i would have. you know, kids are peanuts -- are they peanuts? kids are people too. but a lot of them can't read, especially the little ones. so every week i get together with a group of children. one of them happens to be my nephew wesley. to read. we have a book club. i'm the president. [ laughter ] last week we had a very lively discussion about the book "good night moon." tonight we sit down and debate the literary merits of another very popular kids' classic. i give you "the giving tree." ♪ >> jimmy: hello, book club. how was your week? >> good. >> jimmy: how are your jobs? everything good at work? >> yeah. >> yeah. >> yeah. >> jimmy: husbands, wives, families okay? >> yeah. >> jimmy: okay, good. well, this is a very good book. do you know what this book is? >> yeah. >> "the giving tree." >> "the giving tree." >> jimmy: that's absolutely right, "the giving tree."

and it's written by -- do you know who wrote it? >> no. >> jimmy: the scariest man in the world. look at that face. >> he looks like a vampire. >> he's not scary. >> jimmy: he's not? rrr! a little bit scary. "the giving tree" by shel silverstein. that's the guy we're talking about. >> yeah. >> jimmy: his name is shel. isn't that strange? >> shel? >> jimmy: i wonder if people ever find him on the beach. >> maybe he lives in a shell. >> jimmy: maybe he is a shell. yeah. let's start the book. >> okay. >> jimmy: once there was a tree. and she loved a little boy. he would climb up her trunk and swing from her branches. take my apples, boy, and sell them in the city. so the boy cut off her branches and carried them away to build his house. he cut down her trunk and made a boat and sailed away. i'm sorry, sighed the tree, i wish i would give you something but i've nothing left, i'm just an old stump. come boy, sit down, sit down and rest.

and the boy did. and the tree was happy. >> guess what? >> jimmy: what? >> that however many lines inside a tree stump, that's how old a tree is. >> i can't wait to get my costume, it has a helmet, it has a tail -- >> jimmy: what does that have to do with "the giving tree" book? your boebafett costume. >> there's nothing like "the giving tree" in real life. >> jimmy: is there a giving tree in star wars? >> no. >> jimmy: i don't think there is -- >> how can there be a giving tree in star wars? >> people actually have another new star wars. >> jimmy: so i think what we're trying to say here is you really have no interest at all in this book, right? >> i do. >> jimmy: you do? do you like the little boy from this book? >> yes. >> jimmy: you do? he seemed kind of selfish to me. >> yeah. he did, kind of. >> jimmy: yeah.

>> when you grow up. >> jimmy: he was nice when he was young. but then he just started taking and taking and taking until he essentially killed his best friend. >> i think i know how the tree felt. because the tree was telling the boy to do the stuff. >> jimmy: you think it was the tree's fault? but at a certain point this boy is an adult and he should know better than to chop this tree down. you can't build a house out of branches. preposterous. what is he, a beaver? [ laughter ] >> a beaver? >> half human, half beaver? no. >> jimmy: is he a beuman? a half beaver, half human? >> that tree didn't have many branches. >> jimmy: i know. then just a stick, then it became a stump, then he just sat on it. >> i think that the tree isn't alive anymore. >> jimmy: well, yeah.

because he sat on it. >> yeah, and he killed him. >> jimmy: yeah. and he pooped on it. >> eww! >> he must have died now. >> jimmy: hmm? >> he must have died. >> jimmy: yeah. everyone in this book is now dead. [ laughter ] so there you go. that's "the giving tree." we did it. [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: it's a weird book. i stand by those remarks. thank you, kids. tonight on the show we have music from the band perry. from "fresh off the boat," randall park is here. and we'll be right back with david spade! [ cheers and applause ] ♪ anything? no. you? no. aflac! what are you guys looking for? claims! legend has it these hills are full of 'em. it can take months for an insurance claim to surface.

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[ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: hello, there. tonight, from the new comedy "fresh off the boat" which airs tuesday nights here on abc, randall park is with us. then later, they just won a grammy for a song on this soundtrack called "glen campbell: i'll be me." it comes out tuesday. the band perry from the at&t stage.

[ cheers and applause ] tomorrow night, oscar nominee keira knightley will join us, from "scandal" the president himself tony goldwyn will be here. and then we'll have music from incubus. please join us then. our first guest tonight is an emmy and golden globe nominated man who's given in to popular demand to revive one of the most beloved characters in all of moviedom, "joe dirt 2." please welcome david spade! [ cheers and applause ] ♪ >> hey! yeah! nice. >> jimmy: by the way, thank you for coming tonight. you came at the last minute. sam smith was supposed to be here. >> yeah. >> jimmy: he was at the grammy awards. and apparently he went out to parties afterwards and lost his voice. >> yeah. >> jimmy: and now thank you for coming. >> yeah, i'm a good guy.

[ laughter ] >> jimmy: did you go to the grammy parties? >> no, i get them on my tv. >> jimmy: oh, okay. [ laughter ] >> one of those major cable things. i saw the guy kanye who's always yammering away. manages to say the wrong thing. and he said it to beck, which stings a little more because i look like beck. [ laughter ] i take that a little harder. >> jimmy: there's a resemblance. >> i want to like kanye. it's virtually impossible. [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: you're trying? >> yeah, i'm trying. i mean, beyonce -- how much can she do before he thinks she's going to catch a break in this town? [ laughter ] he's so mad about it. then i hear a song of his and i go, he's all right. then he talks and i don't like him again. and he flies on a diamond helicopter. it's so weird. but how about this?

i don't know much about girls, but when you're with kim and all do is fawn about how great beyonce is, even i know she's like, what about me, babe? [ laughter ] i do stuff. [ applause ] >> jimmy: you don't see jay-z going around -- >> yeah, exactly. it's like, babe, she's talented, it's different. [ laughter ] it's different, it's not the same. [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: i notice you have the facial hair. >> yeah. >> jimmy: is that left over from "joe dirt"? >> yeah, yeah, we did that. we're doing a tiny bit more on it, then the poster, then it's this summer. it will be fun. america finally gets what they've been demanding. [ laughter ] this one is so many twists and turns it's like "inception." [ laughter ] unpredictable. we really thought it out. speaking of guys that are hard to like, are you watching "the bachelor"? >> jimmy: am i watching? i'm living "the bachelor." >> jimmy. jim. >> jimmy: yeah.

you don't like prince farming? [ laughter ] >> is that his name? >> jimmy: that's what we call him. >> prince farming is hysterical. no, i thought his name was jeff. or something. >> jimmy: no, it's chris. jeff? we could never have a bachelor named jeff, don't be ridiculous. >> it's always some dumb name. [ laughter ] but i saw him, and i've only seen one, because i tivoed it. that shows that i'm old. i tivo'd it. i've still got the first season of "mad men" on there, i'm going to watch that. but i saw it and i -- the biggest thing i thought was funny was there's a pool party. it's probably the first one, episode. this is a monologue for "the bachelor." it's 30 chicks. super horny. in bikinis. they're so thirsty for fame. whatever it is. anyway. they're drenched. it's so exciting. honestly. it is like splash mountain down there. [ laughter ] and this guy is the biggest cornball. and he couldn't be in heaven. then he sits, a dope, handstand! they're like, ha ha ha!

[ laughter ] anything he does, they're all over him. if he was in vegas at a pool they'd be like, who's this dude? kick him out. but he's like, whoo! and then i'm watching. everything's going perfectly. some little betty buzzkill comes over and goes, "can i talk to you?" [ laughter ] he's like, huh? she's like, it's really serious. he's drinking out of a coconut and this girl's like we're going to take our tops off. she's like come here for a minute. he's like, ahh! i'm watching going, dude. run. i've had this scenario. it's no good. she takes him into a little hut. all the other girls are like it better not be more than a minute because we get our time. they want to get the rose and all that. he's -- they're all over there. he's like what's up? she's like, my fiance died. i'm like, oh my god. and you know you hear chicken fight! so what happened? first of all, guys can't listen anyway.

now he's got 30 chicks over here. he's so distracted. she's going, like what happened, first of all, it was suicide, it wasn't my fault. [ laughter ] he's like, well, let's get all the data in first before we decide whose fault it is. he goes, right. so everything's cool now? [ laughter ] tries to wrap it up, you know. she goes, no. can you just listen to me? be a person? he's like, ahh. what? she goes, i met him about four years ago. oh, we're going back this far? that fast? let's go. anyway, he croaks, it's not your fault, and great talking to you. cannonball! runs off. [ laughter ] [ applause ] >> jimmy: that really sums it up. >> then they hold on her crying. he didn't listen. he's like, "jackknife!" >> jimmy: i don't want to ruin it for you but he had the decency to wait and not eliminate her that episode, and then eliminate her the next episode. >> that's a smart trip. no one wants a boner kill around there, i know that.

[ laughter ] be fun. you're not going to get a rose. if i was at that maybe ceremony at the end where he's like sussing it out, they're like -- if i was a chick i'd be like, hey, you need a vase for that? be like whoo! you're sticking around. [ laughter ] [ cheers and applause ] buy another week. >> jimmy: david spade is here. the movie's called "joe dirt 2." we'll be right back. [ cheers and applause ] family . get 2 lines of unlimited 4g lte data... for just a hundred bucks a month with any smartphone, including the samsung galaxy note 4 for zero down. add more family members for just $40 bucks a pop. think the other guys have a family plan like this? think again! finally, it's full speed 4g lte data that really is unlimited.

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[ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: hey, we're back with david spade. >> [ bleep ]. >> jimmy: david spade -- "joe dirt 2" the sequel. 14 years ago you made -- >> easy, easy. tennish. well, we always wanted to do it. and you know, it's funny because you hear about movies you do. "joe dirt," i understand it was no huge $100 million hit. but sometimes after time you hear more about some movies than others. obviously, "tommy boy" i hear about the most. and that's the best one. but we can't do anything with that, that's just a one movie that we just really lucked out on and got it right, i think. and then joe -- i hear about "joe dirt" almost more than anything. >> jimmy: people watch it on cable. >> yeah, so now -- it gets in your grill.

they didn't see it the first time, we know that from the stats. [ laughter ] but they had to see it somehow, eh, it's not that bad. now we do another one and it's fun. you've got christopher walken back and dennis miller -- >> jimmy: he's back, that's great. >> yeah. we did. and i think it's funny. >> jimmy: i have a photograph with you of christopher walken. >> that's us on the set. look at that. look at how cool i am. >> jimmy: yes. [ applause ] >> in this one i go back in time. i don't want to give it all away. but i go back in time. i see walken. i meet him earlier. we get rich because i know the future. oh, gave it all away. [ laughter ] anyway. it's funny. >> jimmy: was he fun? >> he's such a stud. we love him. and he was very nice. because he goes, people know "joe dirt," they tell me every day. i don't think he remembers he was in it. he's like, everyone tells me every day. [ laughter ] but he's so nice about it. he goes, they have a nice feeling for it so i want to do another one. when i was in the first one, i'm

the only one in america that can't do a christopher walken impression. you know, struggle through. but we were in a house waiting to shoot and he's in the back with britney daniel and all the cast. we're sitting there, dead silent, they're fixing a camera. no one knows what to say. he goes, "david, you ever work with actor dog?" and i go, an actor dog? no, i don't -- i don't think so. he goes, "they're good. they do what they're told. they sit and stay and they run around and chase stuff." and i go, yeah, cool, okay. keep it in mind. and then he goes -- pause, pause. ever work with an actor cat? i go, an act -- they have those? he goes, oh, yeah it's a big business. and they don't do anything. he goes, if you tell a cat to sit there and do something, they don't take direction. and i go, right. he goes, if you want them to move you have to hit them with a stick. but a regular cat will move if you do that. i go, yeah, yeah. sure. yeah. silence. ever work with an actor mouse?

i go, i don't -- i have not. he goes, i did. "mousetrap." he goes, they're good. [ laughter ] he goes, you tell a mouse to walk up here, take a beat and go left, and they do it. and i go, how? he goes, i don't know. i don't either. he goes, all right. rolling! [ laughter ] so i have all that info. [ applause ] >> jimmy: you became friends sounds like. >> i love him. because he just wanted to share that story. and it was so -- he's a sweetheart. >> jimmy: are you going into this big "saturday night live" anniversary show? >> oh, yeah, he'll be there, that's right. yeah, yeah, yeah, if they can fit me in, my god. >> jimmy: there's a lot of people that are going to be there. >> i honestly think it's like 200 -- i don't know. you know, you've got 40 years of hosts. you've got all the cast members. i'm going, i'm going out with adam on friday. i'll do my own adam sandler for you. adam and chris rock. that will be fun. we're going to get -- we have

our own little clique in the corner. >> jimmy: yeah, right. >> other years. we're all going to -- i think they're doing sketches. i think it sounds super fun. >> jimmy: you guys haven't worked anything out? >> they said, you have a rehearsal time, we don't know what you're doing yet. >> jimmy: what if you get there and you hate it? >> i don't think it's possible. i think it will be super fun. i'll do whatever i'm told. if i'm not even in anything it will be fun because everyone will be there and it will be like a family reunion. >> jimmy: speaking of being there don't you have a problem with eddie murphy? >> no, no, no. >> jimmy: you don't? >> no. my new one's with kanye after tonight. >> jimmy: oh, yeah, okay. [ laughter ] [ cheers and applause ] >> no, no, he's fun, i like him. i'm going to high five him. eddie and i, we cleared it up. >> jimmy: you did. >> just in time. yes. because now i'm going to see him. i saw nimt street. he was nice to me. >> jimmy: oh, all right. >> chris rock used to say, eddie's mad at you. so i said -- he goes, if i see you, i'm not talking to you.

i go is that clear, who you're better friends with? he goes, we go way back. i can't wait to see bill murray. it's going to be super fun. >> jimmy: sounds like it would be a lot of fun. >> yeah. i don't know what to expect. i'll just go there, show up. they'll point me out -- maybe i'll do ba-bye. maybe i'll do gap girl. whatever they -- >> jimmy: first of all, thank you for coming. secondly, it sounds like a lot of fun. i look forward to seeing it. >> tivo it. >> jimmy: thirdly, i hope you don't mind if i speak to the executives here at abc. i would love for you to be the bachelor next season. [ cheers and applause ] >> i'm not x'ing anything out right now. >> jimmy: david spade, "joe dirt 2: beautiful loser" comes up this summer. we'll be right back! [ cheers and applause ] >> dicky: the "jimmy kimmel live" concert series is presented by at&t. mobilizing your world. [richard] america.

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[ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: we're back. randall park, music from the band perry is on the way. before we get to all the oscars are a week from sunday. there are dozens of nominated films to keep track of. as a service to you the viewer we asked our friend yehya to

review some of them for us. this is to help you figure out what you need to see before the big night. tonight yehya reviews a movie i happened to like a lot, best picture nominee "whiplash." here's yehya talking about the movie. ♪ >> action! hi, i'm back again, guy. i'm talking about the movie -- "wubless." the movie talk about young boy who goes student like on the drums. he want to come play like jazz. you know, but the boy, i don't remember. i got picture. he's so young. i don't know him. you know, his name -- miley? tyler? i don't know, miley? like miley cyrus. and the guy, richard simmons, he's in the movie too he's the bald guy. now he do like teacher. drum teacher. like tommy lee. and the guy with the two, i don't know, old grandpeople. the boy he become very good at drumming.

i don't know the name of the movie. like -- the movie there. [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: thank you, yehya. we'll be right back with randall park! [ cheers and applause ] we did it charlie. at&t's network now has the nation's strongest lte signal. let's go tell everybody. we're doing things like putting lte radio's at the top of our towers. to maximize power. and give you the strong signal you deserve. that's awesome! isn't is awesome?!

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[ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: music from the band perry. our next guest played kim jong-un in the movie "the interview." so we're all in danger right now even being in his presence. he has a critically acclaimed new show called "fresh off the

boat," it airs tuesday nights at 8:00 here on abc. please say hello to randall park! [ cheers and applause ] thanks for coming. >> thanks for having me. this is my first lat-night talk show. [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: wow. i wish i would have known. i would have brought flowers. i would have made this special. romantic. >> that would have been nice. >> jimmy: where are you from? >> from l.a. >> jimmy: originally? born and raised? >> born and raised in l.a., yeah. >> jimmy: is your family in show business? >> no, no. i have no family -- i grew up in l.a. but no family in show business. >> jimmy: i thought you were saying you had no family. [ laughter ] >> it's just me. no, no family in show business. no friends in show business growing up. even though i was born and raised in l.a. >> jimmy: were they supportive of your decision to do this? >> not at all. not at all, no.

they wanted me to become a -- like most asian parents, become a doctor. or a lawyer. >> jimmy: to be honest, that's kind of why i asked that. because there's a very practical approach. >> yeah. >> jimmy: you not doing that is strange. >> yeah. so they weren't very supportive at the beginning. when i first like decided to go all out and become an actor, i told them and they were like, no, you know, that's okay. if it's a hobby. just make sure it's a hobby. and i was like, okay. it's just a hobby. and then i started doing it. and they start seeing me on commercials and stuff. and they'd be like, wow. he's really into this hobby. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: what commercials did you do? anything we would remember? >> gosh, i made a living off of commercials for many years. i think the biggest one was this commercial for k-y. >> jimmy: oh, really? >> k-y jelly. yeah, that one aired for a long time. >> jimmy: oh, great. >> people would actually come up to me on the street and be like, k-y!

[ laughter ] and i'd be with my parents. and i'd be like, no, don't. don't. >> jimmy: that's unfortunate. >> yeah. >> jimmy: were you working a regular job while you were doing these? >> i had a lot of regular jobs. i worked at starbucks for a while. i waited tables. the longest job i had was i did graphic design for like a newspaper. like those weekly free new newspapers that you get in the kiosks. >> jimmy: right. >> they put me in charge of the back section of the newspaper, which is basically escort ads. [ laughter ] you know, like massage parlors. prostitution ads, basically. >> jimmy: really. >> yeah. and it was -- >> jimmy: what would you do? >> it was my job to design those ads. >> jimmy: somebody designs those? [ laughter ] >> yes. it was my job to build those. i felt really bad about that job. because we'd use like a lot of stock photos. like models. you know. >> jimmy: these are like -- yeah, you can get --

>> call tiffany for a good time. and we'd use like these images of these models from these stock photos. you know, basically these poor like aspiring models who like decided to -- yeah. yeah. it was really sad. >> jimmy: so they don't know, they have no idea -- >> they have no idea that they're being depicted as prostitutes. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: boy. >> yeah. >> jimmy: that's got to be a hell of a surprise. >> gosh, yeah. >> jimmy: worse than the k-y commercials. >> that is way worse. [ laughter ] but the saddest part would be like -- sometimes actual pimps would come to the office with like a stack of polaroids. >> jimmy: what? >> for us to scan and use in the ads. like they were actual like prostitutes. >> jimmy: that's good, some honesty in advertising. [ laughter ] >> yeah, but then i'd look at the photos and i'd be like, you really should use a stock photo. [ laughter ] because some of these photos would have like their kids in the background and stuff. [ laughter ] yeah.

like a pitbull on their lap. and i'd be like, no, this is not good. >> jimmy: wow. that is pretty crazy. >> yeah. so i'm really glad to be out of that. >> jimmy: were you at all nervous when you took the role playing kim jong-un? >> kim jong-un. >> jimmy: was that something that you thought about? >> yeah, i thought about it. but i mean, i didn't expect any of that to happen. that was like a real shock. >> jimmy: the haircut is tough enough to start with. >> that was the worst. yeah. i thought that was as bad as it would get. >> jimmy: yeah. >> yeah. i have to -- literally i walked around with a beanie all the time. i'd be in like a house with the fireplace going on and the heater and i'd have this beanie on just sweating. i just didn't want to take it off. >> jimmy: do you think he has seen this movie? >> i have a feeling he has, yes. >> jimmy: you do? >> i'm pretty sure he has, yes. >> jimmy: have you heard that from anyone or you have a sense?

>> no confirmation but -- i don't know. i'm sure he knows about it. and is probably interested in seeing how he's depicted. >> jimmy: wouldn't it be funny if he didn't know anything about it, after all this craziness? i don't know, i don't care. i'm busy exterminating my relatives. >> yeah. >> jimmy: you guys don't get the paper? [ laughter ] >> i'm pretty sure he's seen it. >> jimmy: you're pretty sure he's seen it. wow. that's something else. that would be an uncomfortable head to head. i'd love to have the two of you on the show together. >> yeah, yeah. [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: get a call. we'd like you to come to kim's birthday party. this show you're on, first of all, is getting great reviews. right immediately. it's based on a true story, memoir about a family. you play the dad. >> i play the dad. i play the writer of the memoir, his name's eddie huang, celebrity chef, personality,

great writer. good friend. and he -- it's basically about his childhood in the '90s. with his family making the move from washington, d.c. to the predominantly white suburbs of orlando. it's about kind of the family's adjustment to this new world. >> jimmy: yeah, yeah. it's -- it's like the small world ride in a way, i guess. and did you meet the guy? have you studied him? >> yeah, yeah. before we went into production for the series we actually flew out to orlando and we met the family. >> jimmy: they're still in orlando? >> they're still in orlando. i got to meet the dad lewis. and -- great guy. in the show my character has a restaurant called cattleman's ranch and he's trying to get it off the ground. that's the reason they moved to orlando in the first place. the actual lewis huang in orlando took us to the actual cattleman's ranch which was really cool. it's a hooters now, though. >> jimmy: it is? [ laughter ] that is very orlando. how does lewis feel about the fact that you played kim jong-un and him? [ laughter ] >> i don't know, he didn't really bring it up.

>> jimmy: he didn't. >> he just kind of looked at me like, what's up with this guy? yeah, yeah. >> jimmy: congratulations on how well the show is doing. >> thank you, yes. [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: "fresh off the boat." tuesday nights at 8:00 right here on abc. randall park, everybody! thank you, randall. we'll be right back with music from the band perry! [ cheers and applause ] >> the "jimmy kimmel live" concert series is presented by at&t. mobilizing your world.

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the "jimmy kimmel live" concert series is presented by at&t. mobilizing your world. >> jimmy: many thanks to david

spade, randall park, apologies to matt damon, we ran out of time for him. "nightline" is next. first here with glen campbell's classic "gentle on my mind" from the "i'll be me" soundtrack, the band perry! [ cheers and applause ] ♪ ♪ it's knowing that your door is always open and your path is free to walk that makes me tend to ♪ ♪ leave my sleeping bag rolled up and stashed behind your couch ♪ ♪ and it's knowing that i'm not shackled by ♪ ♪ forgotten words and bonds or the ink stains that are dried upon some line ♪

♪ that keeps you in the backroads by the rivers of my memory ♪ ♪ that keeps you ever gentle on my mind ♪ ♪ here we go ♪ it's not clinging to the rocks and ivy planted on their columns now that bind me ♪ ♪ or something that somebody said because they thought we fit together walking ♪ ♪ it's just knowing that the world will not be cursing or forgiving ♪ ♪ when i walk along some railroad track and find and find that you're moving ♪ ♪ that you're moving on the backroads by the rivers of my memory and for hours you're ♪

♪ just gentle on my mind ♪ come on ♪ though the wheat fields and the clotheslines and the junk-yards and the highways come between us ♪ ♪ and some other woman's been crying to her mother 'cause she turned and i was gone ♪ ♪ i still might run in silence tears of joy might stain my face ♪ ♪ and the summer sun might burn me till i'm blind ♪ ♪ but not to where i cannot see you moving on the backroads ♪ ♪ by the rivers flowing gentle on my mind ♪ ♪ well, i dip my cup of soup back from a gurgling crackling cauldron in some train yard ♪

♪ my beard a-rustling, cold towel a dirty hat pulled low across my face ♪ ♪ through cupped hands round the tin can i pretend to hold you to my breast and find ♪ ♪ and find ♪ that you're waiting from the backroads by the rivers of my memories ♪ ♪ ever smilin' ever gentle on my mind ♪ ♪ you are gentle on my mind ♪ you are gentle on my mind ♪ gentle on my mind [ cheers and applause ] ♪

this is "nightline." >> tonight, nascar suspends driver kurt busch indefinitely for alleged domestic violence, just two days before the daytona 500. on the track he's known as the outlaw. and this evening a judge has ruled in favor of his ex-girlfriend patricia driscoll. >> he popped up out of bed and grabbed me by the throat. rescuing hannah. >> hannah's coming home. >> the incredible story of a 16-year-old girl, her alleged kidnapper, and the fbi's desperate mission to save her life. this new surveillance video showing the standoff during the last moments of her captivity.